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(+3)

Okay, so.

I absolutely loved this game. It was a really cool way of story telling and how the different restarts of the game melded the stories together and gave an overall story and how the characters' drive and wants were revealed was pretty well done! 

The introduction of knowing Emily and then David and then the Warden, it was all really done well and seeing how the choices was pretty cool! The voice acting really took my by surprise and it was pretty cool to see it done!

I really enjoyed the characters and their personalities as well how things were eluded to and the player had to piece them all together little by little. That was a super fun way of getting through the story and using the options to build more of the story! Great job on that!

The one biggest annoyance I had with the game was that there was no skip or save functionality. It took ages just to get back to the part where one could do a different choice or something different to see if that would have an effect on things, and if it didn't work out, you would have to go through it ALL again. It got very tiring. I almost ended it at the first and second ending, but I forced myself to go through more of the game out of interest to see what would happen. Adding that functionality might help if you update the game in the future!

Now,I say the rest of this because I do really think that this game was super fun and I loved what you did, and I see some things that could be improved to make it even more whole and connect better. I did read that this was an experimental project and you'll definitely make games that are as good and better than this, but just thought having some things that could help with the future might help!

The main problem that I saw with the story was that one; the phases of the story initially seemed really wonky at first. The first part of getting to know Emily and then suddenly you are talking to someone called David and then you're trying to input commands into the console. It goes from slow to suddenly two phases of the story going through, feels a bit wonky at first. This is ironed out by the first restart of the game and then realising you have to try to get to the Warden (But again, this takes forever as you have to go through the entire game again.)

Also to talk about the Warden, I didn't even realise that the command was given to the player until after I accessed the Warden and I was in a run after that. I personally think that the Error doesn't pop out enough, or at least, it didn't for me, and I only did it by trial and error. Maybe having a bigger warning or a warning that always persists multiple times would make it more noticeable, as a lot of time does go between the Warden console message and actually inputting the command, so a player could forget it even happened.

But yeah,the game then goes on with the endings and using commands and talking with David and Emily again, and the pacing here is better but it still feels a bit wonky (To me personally at least). I think that maybe having times where David's messages or Warden messaging the player while they are talking to Emily or Emily remember certain events suddenly and forgetting it might entice the player to find out more things and keep playing as well as keep the pacing continuous and interesting! Though I thought it was cool that the Warden did send a console message at first, was a nice touch!

Also I felt like the first ending was a bit.. Contradicting? At first the player is told the everything will end, and then in the ending the player is told that that things always restart, but that... Seemed random? More for a reason to keep playing rather than something in the story. As again, later on it's said that David wants to shut everything off, but.. He doesn't in the first ending? As things keep cycling? So that is contrary to what happens though sort of patched over in the story,

Then the third ending just came out of nowhere and it doesn't seem to fit with anything at all. It's a nice supplement to the endings and to see how the soul could be used and how the mother talks and comments on Emily and David and talks in between; that was super cool! But the ending itself just seemed to.. Exist and though that's fine, but it just didn't seem like it had that much place in the overall story of the game, again, it was a really cool thing to see how things changed with Alice's soul though, great story concept there!

Also it was through trial and error and seeing it externally, that I figured out the Alice ending, which I feel like could have been hinted to a bit better.

I also personally thought that solidifying the Warden as being either code or a creature would have been better. While I do get that David seeing it as a creature but it could be a program mystery being fun, it just seemed to make things a little confusing and even the Warden itself said stuff that went a little bit around the place. The way I saw it was that The Warden was a program that was personified as a demon, and I feel like having that solidified or even put down as an actual demon could have made it better overall to understand what was happening (At first, when the player is finding everything out.)

Again, I want to say that those are just my opinions on how the game could be improved, you do not have to take any of it to heart. I know that everyone has different visions and I could see things differently from how you do. 

I still think your game and experience was absolutely amazing and the story concepts you had and the way it was done with the computer code, was fantastic and I was really into how the story was being done! I really do hope to see you and your next game as you are a great storyteller and I haven't seen something like this done in Renpy, and also the mysticism, the themes, and also the environment and ambiance you created, was just really well done! Would love to see more! You are a wonderful storyteller and you can definitely make amazing games!

So good luck for future projects and do take care! (Also happy New Years!)

(+1)

Happy New Year
Happy New Year
May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbor is a friend
Happy New Year
Happy New Year

(+1)

Hey, thanks for the comment. I can understand the game can be a little wonky since it toys with the narrative, requiring the player to play hide and seek with different functions and reveal the secrets. As for the story being a bit nonsensical, there has been some content cut from the final game, specifically it was meant to have much more different interactions with Emily with each playthrough to explore the idea of her losing her mind. The endings could be not satisfying as they weren't meant to be. Warden notifies they are stuck in a programming loop no matter what they do. It's a bit of a meta story here, the player being themselves trying to free the people inside a program that was meant to be a forever repeating itself loop. It's less about the people inside the game and more about the program and programming itself and the feeling of repeating the same process over and over again like a program with an error.

Hello! Something new about a new game?