I get that, I understand, but sometimes being raised up a certain way, you don't know how else to raise your own child. The only way you know is how your parents raised you. Some people swear they won't be like their parents but when push comes to shove they find out that they don't know how else to act, it's what they were taught.
People raised in households where physical aggression is a normal thing will grow up to have higher rates of physical aggression. They haven't been taught otherwise, this is not bad to them, it's normal, this is just how things are, because that's what they were raised with.
That's not to say you will always always end up like your parents. People with bad parents can turn out to be the best parents ever. It all just depends on lots of different things.
Of course your parents have a reason for treating you the way they did. Of course it's okay that you make mistakes and do this or that because of everything you've been through. But it's also okay to acknowledge that it hurt you or someone else even if you or this other person are trying their best. It still hurt. And that's not something you can just brush off and say "they're just trying their best" abuse will always be abuse. Understanding their POV won't make it hurt any less. If something someone says hurts you, and you know they didn't mean to, you should tell them. Don't just go "well, they didn't mean it" cause they won't realize that it hurt you and they'll think it's okay to do or say that when it isn't.
Communication is important.