Commenting because I have no idea if this was intended to be funny, but felt you needed to know that it was.
The entire "look at yourself in the mirror" section is amusing for striving to be as vague as possible, but what made me laugh was the last line.
"Looking great, tiger."
It just immediately made me go "wait..." and laugh, completely unable to tell if that phrasing was chosen to fuck with the player or not.