This game shows a lot of promise. I'd make two critiques.
One, as a writer and professional editor I'd tell you: show don't tell. Make sure you are describing actions and experiences of the MC. Similes and metaphors are your friends that allow the player to connect with the MC at a sensory level. It also makes it more engaging.
The second thing is the torso's: they all seem to be the same and are very much too human, it would be nice if we could get some texturing or shading on them to give it more depth.
But this game shows great promise!