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Have you ever got bummed playing a game? Like things were so great in it, it made you question your own life? 

I feel like I've wasted my life sometimes playing games like this. In Eternum things play out so great. Heartwarming scenes. Romance. Battles. But despite my best efforts my life has always been shit. Poverty and loveless. All I can say is that I worked hard to keep my parents out of an Old Folk Home and they know I love them. But I've never been good at being social. I never like drinking and parties and taking chances at a "live fast, die young" lifestyle. Now at 36, soon to be 37, I know my times is running out. And (un)like Nancy and the mother from OIAL, there's nothing I can do to feel young or revived again. Even other JRPGs and my job don't feel fulfilling. I just don't know what I can do to make my life feel like it was one worth living. I'm even trying to work out again so women will take notice of me. But they still never do. And I doubt I'll be writing novels or comics to pay the bills, so I'm stuck sticking with my warehouse job. 

I've never been suave or cool. I'm just hardworking and dedicated and a man of my word. Integrity. But that means nothing to most people where I live. Or if it does it won't make women like me or men respect me. I'm just a plain joe in a crowd that is slightly overweight. But one thing I can promise is I will keep fighting to my deathbed for the hope that my life will at least end in a happier way. Maybe one day a women will love me and I will actually draw a piece of art that gets famous. I'll hold on to that and not give up.

And I suggest anyone who might be depressed like me, not give up either. It's not over until you're dead. I hope everyone gets love and respect in their lives. AND with that, I'm all caught up on Eternum and awaiting the next big update.

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"Now at 36, soon to be 37, I know my times is running out."
.. life doesn't start until you're [current age]

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Due to a lot of bad experiences as a kid and teen, I basically gave up on romance and my career dreams because I was always too poor or unpopular or unattractive to get them done. You can't make people hire you and you can't make people like you. If you find the girl of your dreams and you want to get to know her, she may be disgusted by you. Want that job as a cartoonist? Too bad no one wants to train you to be the best or ever hire you for storyboards. I keep fighting, hoping things get better but they don't. 

I play lots of games but sometimes all they do is depress me because I can't make my life any better. So games like Eternum are bittersweet to me. I like them but they always make me uncomfortable with all the scenes I know will never happen to me. It's hard trying to cope with being no one in society that is desired. 

People are creating their own careers , being their own boss,  everyday online.   Also i promise you, beating yourself up is the best way to never ever have the life that you want.  Girls like confidence.  Also try dating online.  It's infinitely easier.   Especially for introverts.

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I'm sure some girls like confidence, but I'm pretty sure sooner or later a woman has to understand that a guy is feeling down in the dumps for a good reason. 

I always avoided online dating because a lot of time people lie about who they are or are looking for a booty call. 

I guess I can see self-publish or do a webcomic.

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dont do online dating ffs, its just a fucking trap. dude giving that kinda advice is prolly a simp.
the kinda girl a normal guy wants to meet, is not on online dating (well, maybe one in a million, but they dont stay long, cos the guys are just as bad as the girls at online dating sites/apps). you'd be far better off, as a random example, going to a chess club, if you are into chess, and want a girl that is into chess, or a sports club, if you want a girl that is into sports, etc. you might need to lower your expectations, and hope you find someone with realistic expectations aswell, or it just wont last long even if you hit it off. find a girls who understands human nature, and doesnt just think she knows it all and "i can do anything i want, GIRLPOWER". a 'down to earth' girl, the type that is doing normal things, not browsing the meat-market online.
its still no guarantee, but at least yr gonna find women who are not just looking to use some guy for a weeks worth of foodie-dates, or to trap them with pregnancy for child support payments, or are actually a guy in china trying to get your trust before "her grandma is dying and needs you to send money" or the multitude of other scams that are the bread-and-butter of online dating nowadays.
honestly, at least it seems you understand how the world treats us outsiders (those who dont fulfill the "ideal guy" trope), so this advice is more for other ppl who come along later in history, sounds like you know how the world works already.

until then, games like this, while bittersweet, can at least keep you triggering those hormones, so you dont end up androgenous.
these kinda games are the closest thing to a proper sexbot, theyre like intellectual porn.. well, games of the calibre of carbidis' work is anyways.

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that was always my greatest fear: scams, STDs, and teen pregnancy. I didn't take any chances. No parties, no drinking all the time and making bad calls. So people said I was boring. I always like games and shows and biking. And in the hood most people are not gonna be understanding when you tell them your fav game is Eternum or OIAL. They're not gonna get it. Loving lore and character development? That's not cool. That's not badass. So I gave up and for 15 years, I didn't even try to date or flirt. Just accepted that life is not a romantic comedy or ero VN or soap opera. Life is just a 9 to 5 and some fun games when you get home. 

Yeah, the one good thing about OIAL and Eternum and a few other games is that you can still feel something. When I go thru the content I'm not just mindless skipping dialogue till I find a choice for a sex scenes. I remember character names. Try to guess plot twists. Try to find secrets without pissing out the ladies. Bittersweet it may be, but I'm glad I got into his games. Because before I played OIAL didn't think any VN could make me laugh. I didn't think any erotica could make me care about a character who wasn't a love interest. Like how I wanna see Chang happy and dating someone. Or how, even if she wasn't dating Orion, I'd want to see Luna happy. That's why I messed up my play thru with OIAL, I tried to fix Judie and The Teacher up with good relationships that weren't always the MC because I felt selfish and greedy. I thought "what am I a monster? I don't need to fuck every woman." But the joke was on me because, yeah, things go better for them if you do in that game. Fuck every woman and romance them and cockblock all dudes. Not my style but I'm trying to take the good with the bad. Live and learn. Sometimes you gotta be a little selfish in Caribdis games. And maybe I gotta be a little more confident and selfish IRL too. And tell women I like them instead of just being supportive to them and hoping they understand my feelings . 

Thanks for hearing me out. 

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Well not sure about your online dating experience, but mine was great.  Been together for 5 years and counting.  Plus she looks amazing.  You know how you weed out traps?  You video call for your conversations.  Using any of the many apps and websites in 2022.  But good luck either way you do it.   There's no shame whatsoever in being down.  We all go through it.  Just don't stay down   Try to build yourself up slowly with character, skills and knowledge until you meet her.  

good advice. Thats why I like the comedy in Eternum and OIAL, it keeps me in a better mood on those days play games and working all the time really gets me down. 

You really lucked out meeting someone. I'm happy for you. I don't think that would happen for me but at least I know someone people meet others they like. Maybe I'll give it another try one day. Video chatting is way better than going straight to blind dates. 

I feel like romance and love are truly something to keep fighting for and hoping for. And I will keep trying.