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Nebelwesen2 years ago

Thx for your answer :)

The comparison with Real Life was only meant for those Points that make a Story beliebeable for the reader. And i think on that front, you are very good. Your characters make sense. Your MC in Petal Among Thorns was reassuring and looking after Petal in a plausible way. Fanatsy is good because of difference and similarity with real Life.

And there i thought that the MC wasnt beliveable in saying to Petal he wants to pause for a week and gets in action the next day. Maybe one more day getting warm with Bliss would have seemed more plausible. The bonding with Petal was so much more in depth and with Bliss its getting fast. Bliss is more active and the girls set the pacing in your games. But the MC could have stalled it for a little bit.

I was comparing your game with Light of my Life where the Girls are also the driving factor, but the MC is much too bland as he is sometimes only a stupid fools that sees stuff happen to him. Your MC is a lot deeper written, but here his resolve melts like nothing and he doesnt even see that. That s why it felt rushed.

But hey, i would never have so much to say, if i wouldnt like your game so much. I am eagerly looking forward to the next chapter and see it all unfold. 

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Lockheart2 years ago

It'll all make more sense a bit later. There are things at play in the background that the player isn't seeing yet. 

NaughtyRoad's Light of My Life is using the MC more as a vessel for people to self-insert. It works for a large majority, but I prefer to have an MC that has his own in-depth personality. It's just different styles. I've had quite a few complaints about the shift from first-person to third person, but this way allows much more freedom to open up MC's character. You please some, you disappoint some. It's a harsh balancing act. 

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Nebelwesen2 years ago

There you are quite right. 1st person and 3rd person makes a big difference, Just as the vessel or the written MC. But those Vessels dont really work out. You need to indentify with the words the MC says and a lack of those creates a feeling of passivity, which feels like a personality trait as well. I am not a fan of that approach as well.

Your third person perspective took a moment of adjustment for me as well, but you designed him very good. So the adjustment worked well. But i wonder if it feels different for you as well in the writing process. Like if there is less inclination to articulate equally pronounced feeling as in 1st Person. I could imagine that there are subtle differences. For writing you take a position in a narrative inverionment as well and a different perspective might change something there as well.

Well thx for taking your time to answer my posts. Much appreciated. Have a good time making your Artwork.

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