*spoilers*
I am in awe of this - as someone already stated before - first real visual novel I have found on this site.
The content fills hours. I discovered it yesterday and tried to finish it in one sitting until the current EN translation ends, but I could not make it. I went to bed early in the morning pretty much fainting.
It is very captivating.
The inner monologues and conversations are very much like a proper novel where all characters are properly aware of their feelings and have pleasant conversations . And that's what many VNs on this site do not have.
And yes. I ugly cried as well. A lot. More than 6 times. Very touching story.
Although sometimes the wording seems off and hyphens mix spoken lines with thoughts, it it always possible to understand what is going on.
Sure the file size is big, but it is absolutely worth it for the music and images. My goodness those songs. And those drawings. The way these 2 look at each other. Good job.
I assume you are working from personal experiences with some of this - or maybe you just like your last name, your sister and the color blue. :D
I very much enjoyed the sudden body switch to hear the thoughts of George while Lucas is in a coma.
It is very clear that you are the master of this story, because some things are just a little far off, but it somehow work. Many breadcrumbs are properly resolved throughout the story and not forgotten about.
Some examples of what I could have lived with less of:
- The supernatural dream part with precognition and the connection to the cat. I enjoyed the mixture of dream and not dream, but maybe it is overdone a little.
- George's age. 30 is not that old! And it is unlikely to have a remote cabin at a lake at this age. Also there was talk about recent money issues right? Likely because of the alcoholism and divorce ongoings.
- The time scale. Things move fast! Lucas knows exactly the right people to move the story along fast. Very fast. I guess that's ok and on purpose :D
- The plagiarism thing. I don't understand how stolen scribbles can cause a legal issue and I hope there will be some clarifications. As far as I understand rights are properly secured before comics are published. But you seem to move it way to the background. I am not even sure if George knows about this. Likely part of the ex-wife sidestory.
- The mixture of dream and not dream. This is interesting in the beginning but maybe it is used too much.
The drama. I know it is needed nowadays, but it is a lot to digest:
- Semi-consensual rape by good fried ("brother") that turns into deep, deep trauma. This one is fine, still off to me since I do not have experience with this.
- Child abuse accusations towards George and a lawsuit for it by his ex-wife? Also some alcohol addiction sub tones? I assume this goes somewhere but right now it is just confusing and especially the abused the daughter allegation seems uncalled for.
- The parents. They just show up and leave again.
- The scar on Lucas' neck and its backstory. Gruesome. I assume this is something you experienced.
- The undercover job George did that somehow went totally south. Was this recent? Was this the stab wound he had in the ER with Chief Johnson? I mean it can't since he was wearing his uniform right? This thing was timeline wise super confusing or maybe I just misunderstood. How did it relate time-wise to the divorce? The alcoholism?
- The criminals infiltrated with the undercover job decide to kill Lucas just like that?
- The fire. Wow, buddy, that's a lot so close to that family Christmas party. And arson with another big bad behind it (at least I hope it is another big bad, because it would be very cliche if its the ex-wife or the mafia). Also if the top floor of a high-rise building was on fire, I do not think that the floor below can be still lived in afterwards. But no worries thats ok :D
However, all of this this makes the story rich and rounded and I assume most of it will be resolved in parts that are not translated yet.
Fantastic work!
PS: I am super pissed that you sent Donnald to the ICU with a long term coma! (once again, I assume this will be going somewhere)
PPS: Lucas' earrings were explained as gift from Robert. Whats with the ring on a string around George's neck? Is he wearing his wedding band after the divorce? Are the hostilities with his ex-wife that recent? (I mean yeah, in the beginning she wanted to get back together with him. Me confused.)