I mean, just don't play it if it makes you feel that way, it's unfortunate but I can't imagine why you would want to keep feeling uncomfortable
I am not forcing myself to play out of misguided spite. I play this game (and others with solely female MCs) because I want to. I love the Regency Era, I love romance, and I love the pining that comes with being a lesbian in a period story. There's not many games with all three that I can live through vicariously, so some sacrifices must be made.
Not to say that it is a sacrifice to pretend to be a woman. You do not know my gender identity, therefore you do not know my limits, but it isn't as cut and dry as "being referred to as a woman is bad for me". I still identify with womanhood and its societal expectations. I still identify with sapphic relationships. I much prefer pretending to be a cis woman to be lesbian in a game because the feeling in the relationship is entirely different to me. Being a cis woman in a game whose only romance options are men doesn't feel... as fulfilling. And it's amazing that there's a Regency Era game where those lesbian relationships are at the head of the game (with a 2:1 ratio!!) and it's unapologetically lesbian. Not a half-hearted participatory award in representation.
TL;DR... I would pick a nonbinary option if I could, but I'm completely fine with being cis as long as I still get to romance ladies because the dynamics feel fuller than a hetero relationship. And please consider how already niche genres are even more limited for people who aren't cishet, so we usually have to make do with what's available.
Thank you so much for the feedback! I really appreciate hearing this perspective. I’m so glad to hear that the focus on sapphic relationships resonated with you, as that was my original aim with the story.
I also want to acknowledge the discomfort of being addressed in an inauthentic way in a gender-locked game. It wasn’t my intention to make players uncomfortable, but it’s an unfortunate outcome of LaF’s current gender-locked state.
I started writing LaF when I thought I was a cis woman and hadn’t worked out my own gender and presentation. I was comfortable writing female protagonists, and that informed my decision to gender-lock the protagonist. I no longer consider myself a cis woman, nor do I present that way. I’ve also gotten comfortable writing protagonists and perspectives outside my own lived experience.
LaF’s hiatus is (in part) due to my discomfort with continuing the story in a gender-locked state. I am still unsure how I want to address this going forward. But hearing this perspective resonates with me. I will keep this in mind as I continue to work on Love and Friendship.
Thank you again for the feedback and support!