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wow, the Chromebook my dad got me (so that i can't really play games on it) is struggling to even load the intro animation... i knew Chromebooks sucked but turns out they are far worse than i even imagined....

That loading animation is actually generating the whole game level by level so it's quite expensive. The rest of the game should run faster once it's done. I could consider doing a Linux build, that might run on a Chromebook?