Hey there, for your first ever visual novel I think you did a pretty good job! The characters and story were pretty interesting and I appreciate the implementation of multiple endings. I really like the music used in the title screen and throughout the game.
There were a few grammar errors here and there, but they didn't deter me from enjoying the game.
Overall it was a pretty good visual novel, and I encourage you to keep on creating!
I also made a short let's play of the game, I hope you don't mind.
Cheers and best wishes.