Let me tell you a story. When I was a little girl, I loved to draw. I drew whenever I could. I had this weird, cartoony style. But I loved it. However, my grandma shamed me for it. Whenever I handed her a picture I’d drawn for her, she’d want to know why it wasn’t photorealistic. I was six. How the hell does a six year old pull off photorealism? And my teachers genuinely thought my art style was a side effect of some mental issue. There was more shaming there.
Eventually, tiny little six-year-old me stopped drawing as much. What was the point, if anyone who saw my pictures would shame me or try to get me medicated?
Fast forward to today. I’m 30 years old and trying my hand at game development. Too stubborn and scared to ask someone else to do the art for me. So I break out a sketch diary. I draw a dude: the main human character seen throughout the game, in fact. I give him a mask and put his hands in his pockets to make things easier for myself. I draw him over and over. Finally, I get someone who’s the closest to being properly proportioned I’ve ever done. I scan him into the computer, retrace everything, color it in to match the drones I’ve already added...and I try to make myself be happy with it. Technically, he’s the best human drawing I’ve ever done. Especially since, as I mentioned, I’ve not been drawing for years. I have a distinct style that, with practice, could be something fun and unique for the full game (and passable for this demo).
But I just keep hearing all those voices in the back of my head. “It’s not photorealistic, so therefore its bad.” And I have a pit in my gut, and I feel like everything is already crashing and burning and we’re only six or seven days into Devtober.
Moral of the story: don’t friggin shame small children for not having the art skills of an adult, seriously wtf is wrong with you? They grow up to have hardly any art skills at all, do you want that?
Anyway, today I drew the main dude and got him into the game. Tomorrow I work on the other two human characters, then after that I work on the enemies. And hopefully, I learn to shut up those voices from the past. And just focus on making the demo. Then, afterwards, focus on improving my art skills for the full game.