itch.io

Here's p———'s response, as you saw in the server (posted here for posterity): "i'm really sorry you also went through being a kid like this.. i think something that still makes me really angry about the way kids are treated is like.. being loved around people and misloved when people aren't around.. knowing nothing you do will fix things.. and especially how they tell you how you're supposed to feel or react so you don't even get to have your own feelings or boundaries..  thank you very much for reading our story and especially sharing the visual notes you took,, which really hurt to look at but like in the way that it hurts to be seen,, you know?? i hope you treated yourself to something nice after reading it 💖💖💖💖"

I think something I wanted to add is that we've struggled for a long time with "re-parenting [ourselves]", that is to say, giving ourselves now the quality and amount of attention and care and guidance we deserved then. Part of it was like a resentment of having to do it instead of someone else doing it (like, "isn't the point that it's someone else doing the caring?", "[we] do enough work already"). But I also think part of it was that it didn't make much sense until looking at our CPTSD through a plural framework and recognizing that behind the flashbacks were entire stuck parts in need of that re-parenting work. I was thinking about this in response to your later comment about the difficulty of relearning how to feel and like and dislike (which I 100% relate to and it feels like a big part of re-parenting is the work of helping each other figure out those things).