Hey Blue, thank you for the INSANELY long review lmao.
I'll answer what stuck out to me, like, Chris is short of Christopher. It's not stated yet, but since you find it fitting, that's good.
Him failing to notice the ber is a result of multiple things, not just the hearing. Manfrey is distracting him and annoying him, then... The neck wound is pretty deep, he wouldn't expect the enemy to stand again. Check Manfrey's CG with the shiny chocha, you can see the open neck. Felt justified enough. He's more of a spy than a frontliner so I can see why this would happen.
Lastly, Moon Blade's name. Roar also wanted to change it, gave me a whole list but nothing really stuck out to me.
Moon Blade sounds nicer than Blade of the Moon, it gets too wordy. Also... You can't fit that in the display name. So DeviantArt OC it is and will be uwu
Ah yeah, the ESL. Bruh. Do I look native speaker to you? Both you and Golden told me no :(
As long as you understand the story, label that good enough.