Wow, what a great experience. As someone who doesn't usually play these sorts of games, and tend to skip through dialogue in a large number of games (although the games I've played often tend to focus on writing second anyway), the brief pauses after an option really forced me to read it, and before long I was voluntarily reading all of it (speaks to the quality of your writing too).
The visuals are also great, very appealing yet concise, and the only feedback I feel that I could really give is maybe some additional sound effects/dynamic visuals (although I'm not sure how easily Twine supports this), but overall extremely polished and very unique.