I love the worldbuilding and the concept for the game. You did a great job of bringing together two interesting concepts in a really compelling way. It reminds me a lot of Terry Pratchett's Vimes novels in a good way.
Maybe I missed something. There are a lot of references to a clue track which feels like it could be a compelling addition to the game, but then it's not articulated in the actual text and there isn't a mechanical element stated. This feels like a lost opportunity.
Overall the game feels a little overwritten, this isn't necessarily good or bad, it's just my read on it. There are so many details and elements that are potentially useful, but probably won't appear in the game. In part that makes the document longer and noisier than I would like. Dolmar is so fleshed out as a setting that it feels a bit wasted, and I feel like it would be better to have a comprehensive Dolmar setting, and make this one of many modules within it. Likewise, there is a ton of information about fire fighting, both real work and in game, that doesn't have mechanical weight. They're great payoffs for people who can use them effectively, but there's a lot of unneeded information.
I'd say a focus on the game, if you want to make revisions, would be quality of life and UX modifications. Things like a map of the tower (even just as a flowchart), dialing back on some of the extraneous details, and consolidating some of the rules text would go a long way without a lot of changes. The bones of this game are fantastic, just a little bit of rewriting to make it more user friendly could take it to the next level.