its getting bad again guys
I'm afraid if I say what it is I'll jinx myself and go to point of hard return
uhhh I didn't eat at all yesterday, day before I ate once and it wasnt that much.
today doesn't feel like a good day either, but I don't know if I can really do that?
I dunno. Maybe its just cause ik Christmas is coming up and I don't wanna not eat at Christmas so I'm like preparing?? idfk
but its not that I don't want to eat, its that I physically can't.
And I want so badly to be able to talk about it but I can't because nobody can understand that I can't eat, that my body will reject it, that it will make it worse than it is now and I can't just force it.
Its like my stomach is sending signals to my brain and its just laughing and saying no thank you.
All I can have is water.
And somedays water is almost too much.