Thank you for such an in-depth comment, there's a lot to get through here, but I'll try to keep it short.
To the first point. I completely agree that the cliffhanger is a bit underwhelming and cliche. I'll be working on better ones for future chapters.
To the second point. This is all your opinion. To me all three parts of an AVN are equally important; the A, V, and N should all be given careful attention and be implemented in a way that each one enhances the other to make the whole. Myself and many other players enjoy the A a lot more when there is a connection and we get some kind of emotional pay-off from it because we are attached to the characters. The N part can build that up, thus enhancing the A part.
My MC has issues in Ch. 1 when it comes to dealing with women and just barely starts to break away from that by the end of the chapter. Plus, he barely knows any one of them, with the exception of Layla. You later mention that you care about immersion, well, would it not be immersion breaking for the MC with these particular issues to be a horn-dog and just hook up with all of these people he barely met? I'm sorry, but I'm not going to ruin the vision of my game by turning it into another constant f-fest. There will be a LOT more A content in the future, but at the moment it makes no sense narratively for my game to be that way.
To the third point. It would also be immersion breaking that Astara, someone who lives in a big city, just happens to own a vehicle perfectly suited to the environment that she has to go to this one time. It might have been difficult, but that motorcycle is what she had, and it's not impossible that it could make it to where it did for several reasons. Especially, when you factor in what her power is.
All-in-all, there's some solid feedback in here that I will take into consideration, but I'm not going to rescope my project into a mindless horny game where there is more A action than there is actual story. If that makes me lose some players, so be it.
I would not deign to tell you how to make your game. Let me get that right off the bat.
Working in reverse order, that comment about the bike was not really anything important... though as someone with teeny tiny little bit of experience on two wheels... there are a LOT of people who actually DO ride things like Triumph Tigers or BMW GS's in cities, precisely because they DO roll solo, and roam a lot, including some rough stuff. That is just my bike nerd, it aint a thing, but just since you said it was unrealistic.
On the first point, sounds like you already get it, and given the quality of the narrative offered so far, I think that is not to be unexpected, so perhaps my criticism was unwarranted, at this early stages. Perhaps I might even check out the later chapters one day, for that part.
Now to the main thing. I would not suggest that ANYONE make a game with MORE sex scenes than story... and I do not know ANY which ever have... but I might be missing some. Certainly there are few pay games using their own engines on other cites which are centred around being sex-sandboxes... but for the MOST part, MOST Adult games do not do that. However, I will suggest that the degree to which we encounter such scenes, as gamers who are looking for adult games, DOES inform us about WHAT kind of game it is, to what degree that A part is actually necessary. I am not alone, though many other people do not bother saying so, but I have a lot of AVNs and speak in a lot of discussions about them across multiple platforms....in believing that the first chapters, of such games, really do inform and set the tone for the adult element of the game. Likewise, the scenes of that nature, do so for the rest of the game to come. It might seem like it is immersion breaking, but the flimsy pretext, long drawn bows, tenuous reasoning, and all the narrative contortions which are in a lot of such games to justify there being adult scenes even early on.
It might be anathema to the quality immersive narrative otherwise aimed for, but it is NEEDED, indeed, to justify those encounters, and those encounters are needed, for pacing. If you AVN is more focused on the VN element, than the A element, it is not, but if the A element really is just as important as much a part of the game... pacing is also important. Back Loading the action, because the MC has finally gotten to understand his circle, they he, his powers, his role his life, and gotten closer to people, which is more realistic.... also means that the spread of the adult content, is skewed massively towards the back end of the game. At least in my play experience with such games which go this way. That actually means that vast swathes of the game, especially early on, are even actually bereft of any meaningful adult content. That is not a subjective thing, I think. If that element of the game IS actually JUST as important as the other elements, the narrative, that immersive, engaging story, and the visuals and aesthetic and story telling through art...then it should be present throughout the game to some degree too.
Personally, and again, I know I am not alone in this from many discussions across many AVNs on this and other sites, whilst one may not need go as cray cray with the loose AF justification gymnastics as games where the MC winds up sleeping with his mother... and sister... and other sister... and cousin... and teacher... and doctor.. and neighbour... and neighbours wife... and everyone else's wife... and all the nuns... and their wives... etc etc... even a being a little wild, and unrealistic, if it means facilitating consistency and pacing of the adult content, is BETTER than AVN trying to be so realistic, it is a slow burn, back loaded, and end of game, with all the adult content, because the rest of the game was the MC realistically establishing those relationships.
Again, not telling you to DO anything, or saying how you SHOULD make your game. Just giving you criticism, meant to be constructive, and some food for thought, by pointing out what will potentially alienate at least SOME of the gamers who play AVNs and who might otherwise play this, and support it. Like it or not, agree or not, there IS a whole sector of AVN players, for whom the A bit is as important, or even MORE so, than anything else, and expect a certain level of it, and spread of it, in any gaming meant to be an AVN. And like I, some of these people will give this game a try, but then form opinions, based solely on this first chapter, as to what the rest of the game will be like. Some of them will conclude it is NOT really much of an AVB... perhaps a lower case...aVN because there is only going to be a little adult content. As I said, if that is actually the case, or you consider the A to be not very important, then this does not matter.
Anyway, it was nice little start, a bit too lean for me, so I will maybe tag it and check back in a couple of years and see what it became but otherwise step out now, but do not misinterpret my criticisms as my trying to somehow cajole you in to making a Gonzo Porn game with tooth floss narrative fluff simply used to join the explicit sex together. That was not my point at all. Thanks for the reply.
Like you said in your first comment, you'll die on this hill. So, I'm not trying to change the way you feel about anything.
What I will say, is this game is planned to have romance, which means, yes, a lot of the Main LIs will be slow burns to various degrees. That's why I have side characters to fill the gaps, who won't be so focused on the romance.