I agree with the other comments, this was some done-well spooky. I felt a bit like a blind person in a slow-burn horror movie. I think the length is right as well, too much weirdness gets exhausting (I also don't mind larger chunks of text). Given the game's whole vibe, you might be able to really supplement it with some context-less chunks of photography (sky segments, something blurred to unrecognizability, etc.). Just a thought.
The checks did feel a little random, but I'm not sure if you just wanted to try the feature (which is fine) or if there are other effects, maybe the flavor of the ending. It wasn't bad, maybe a little distracting, like I kept wondering what it affected.