When you downloaded "looks" from the hub you probably downloaded scenes. Often times creators (who are often just regular users) deliver the look as a scene, but not as an "appearance" which means in order to load that look in any scene, with or without vamX, you would need to first open that scene and save the look as an appearance.
Search this help file for "custom looks":
https://sxvr.com/vamxuserguide/
There is physics, including being able to finger someone. It's easiest to actually finger someone in VR. In desktop mode you could load a pose where he is fingering her, and then use the mouse to have him finger her ("mouse thrust"), but it would be hard to manually control his hand like that in other poses if he wasn't already fingering her in that pose. So in Desktop mode choose a pose where there is fingering, etc., then use the Action system to start the action, or use mouse thrust to manually act.
There is, by default, an orgasm system where the characters are brought to orgasm over time, if anything is touching them in the appropriate places to build arousal.
