Now this is MY kind of game. Real X-files-quality writing set in a brilliantly immersive text-based, first-person format. R!VET!NG.
Sound Design makes it work!!
Now: for the constructive feedback:
- It would have been nice to have some wiggle-room. I understand that the story, as well as the programming, works owing to its claustrophobic stylings, but when my eyes are fixed in place it feels like I’m just too preoccupied to move around. Absurdity is best conveyed according to the TENS!ON BETWEEN action and reaction; hence futile chase scenes ending in dead ends are most conducive to the horror genre.
- Please don’t use plural pronouns in singular mode. I understand that it’s a common grammatical error; believe me: it has triggered me for decades, though I am happy to say that I never accrued the habit. An alarming number of people seem to feel entitled to this sort of vernacular, but it is really offensive to the language, and it does your story little justice when the entire point was to distinguish this everyman from his GROUP of associates. (I will refer to the generic “he” here owing to the fact that Martin is a male name, modeled after Mars the God of War and Men, and anything of such blatant Greco-Roman origin will remain the same even as the “I” and “y” are interchanged in anglicizing the Greek.)
In short: I see tremendous promise in you. You managed to assemble a team of specialists who collaboratively captured the terrors and horrors of corporate life. This is the game that I wish Stanley Parable was, and seeing the appearance of the headless employee with the red tie suggests a possible kinship of influence betwixt us. I congratulate you upon a thoroughly original and immersive, albeit linear, work of art.
[({L.J.)}]