nah man. you're good. I'll try and find my discord, you want to talk, you're welcome to. I tried to kill myself about a week or two ago, I got rid of like half of my stuff, and I stopped eating and drinking. Looking at my stuff as I threw it away, I remembered who gave it to me and when I made it. I realized I was happy with my life, I remembered all these happy memories. Fortunately I like eating, so I didn't go too long without food and water. The point is, I think most people have been in the dark too. You're not completely alone.