Skip to main content

Indie game storeFree gamesFun gamesHorror games
Game developmentAssetsComics
SalesBundles
Jobs
TagsGame Engines
(+2)

This is maybe the best all-around effort I've seen so far. I like that there are several interlocking challenges, time pressure, etc. The icon-driven design immediately appealed to me, although as I got into it I found a few small issues that hurt the usability a bit.

I like the bolding of keywords, but the contrast between the bold and regular text is too great, while that between the regular text and the background is too weak in comparison. The result is that it's hard to read the regular text because your eye keeps getting yanked onto the keywords.

Likewise, there are just so many icons, and they're so graphically strong, that it becomes hard to focus on the text that actually explains what they all mean. Overall, I think you're on the right track with the icons and keywords, you've just got that dial set at like a 9 when it might be better at a 7, because the reader still needs to be able to focus on the regular text in order to make sense of it all.

In terms of the scenario design, the main weakness I see is that repairing the platform airlock is both mandatory before getting basically anything else done, and doesn't seem to have any challenges attached to it. As a result, it doesn't currently seem to add much to the story. Maybe it could be presented (e.g. in the Progression section) as a chance for the players to interact with Captain Singh and pump him for info while he assists with the airlock repairs.

Mechanically, I think the consequences of getting the bends need to be more severe. A point of stress and a penalty on Body saves is a very mild consequence for ignoring a mechanic that's central to the scenario. I'd suggest requiring a save and applying stress/penalties on a successful one (mild case) and a Wound plus partial paralysis on failure. If there were space for it, a special Wound table just for the bends would be cool, up to and including a possible death save for the worst cases.

(+1)

Thank you so much for the detailed response, but also your comments on other modules. I am finally getting to my ratings and after reading a module and formulating an opinion, I will read the other comments and find yours very insightful and covering most of what I wanted to say and better than I could phrase it. For example, I found your comment about the dial from 9 to 7 very helpful. I am preparing to rebuild the document with some design changes and some visual edits to address the contrast issues, and as I looked back on my work there was something I didn't quite like about the execution of it, but you summed it up perfectly. While I love the free icons I used from gameicons.net, I would like to ideally replace them with custom ones, and scrap some others in favor of a small illustration or technical diagram for things like the boat or the sub. 
I also appreciate the notes on the bends - I knew it wasn't enough of a threat but I couldn't figure out how to implement it the way I wanted. The intention was to have it interact with the depth layers and time mechanics, i.e. until you repair the decompression chamber you would have to come up slowly (meaning you are stuck underwater with the threats looming or risk the bends), and even after you repair it you have to take some time in the chamber (more forced downtime in an enclosed space adding to the time pressure, perfect scenario for someone to fail a save and wig out). Your notes gave me a lot of ideas on how to beef up that mechanic and make it more central to the design and pacing of the scenario.