I thoroughly enjoyed my winter walk! I kept freezing though because I wanted to explore all the options and the writing was so compelling, you manage to paint very vivid, nostalgic, beautiful and bittersweet settings and feelings of lost youth and childhood that I think every player will connect to. Your sketches, despite just being sketches, are really charming and contributes very strongly to the setting! I'm really excited to see what they're going to look like when they're complete.
I did find the game over screens slightly jarring, mainly because other than my hands getting cold, I didn't get a quantitative sense of how cold I was getting, and the "freezing" mechanic didn't jump out as something I had to be immediately wary of. Maybe constant sentence/variable that shows how cold you are at the footer of every page, or even warnings like "Better get home now, your fingers are freezing over." or something depending on how frozen you are.
I would also consider breaking the text up into multiple different screens - it's not much of an issue, especially if the player likes to read, but might help add to a sense of progression. Also, I think the screen where I encounter the little girl and she disappears is a dead end as of now.
Lastly, I think the game would be even more immersive and appeal to your senses and the theme of memory, would be to add a soundtrack or some sound effects. The scene inside the pastry shop is sticking with me and I'd love to hear those bells when I enter and the subtle chatter (if any) in the background. Overall, I think you have something beautiful here and I can't wait to see the final product!