Skip to main content

Browse GamesGame JamsUpload GameDeveloper LogsCommunity
Indie game storeFree gamesFun gamesHorror games
Game developmentAssetsComics
SalesBundles
Jobs
TagsGame Engines
secretdoorgaming81 days ago (2 edits)

I hope you don't mind some constructive criticism on your game.  I tried to play it but I am not sure if it's because of the translation from Russian to English was by an ai or by a human but the translation doesn't make any sense in English.  The game really needs a human touch to translate it properly if you used AI or google translator.  

Also, there are certain things about the game that really need some fine tuning before it's properly released such as some of the dialogue went on forever on the same topic and didn't seem to go anywhere example: the discussion about breakfast revolving pie.  Normally I love pie but spending 20 minutes reading about the characters talking about pie was not interesting.  

The game just toke a very long time to get to anything interesting and no horror was to be found and the game seemed to drag on forever.  I do hope you don't take this in a bad way but if I were you, I would seriously take your game down edit and re-write it to be more engaging and then make sure it's properly translated before uploading it.  If you are proud of something work hard on it for days, weeks or months and then once it's perfect or in your eyes perfect than release it for the world to play. :)  

But I did enjoy the art style it's very quirky and maybe explain on your page a bit of the story so people can understand what is going on in this town, so we feel more connected to the characters and their life as currently I just felt kind of lost.  Every good story has a background not just on the characters but on what is happening to them and what this element of horror maybe about. :)

Reply
niceed81 days ago

I understand your indignation about the English language, it is made quite poorly (since some Russian words are simply meaningless in English, for example, bird's milk, it's candy), but about the plot... Those long pointless discussions were made for a reason, as this is a big part of the plot.  In the future, all this will be revealed in detail.  I agree that reading the first part is pointless, but understand that the next demo version will be much more beautiful and better (with 3 days). In the next few days there will be no meaningless dialogues, I will work on the English language, I will make a game that will be interesting to play. I don't like the first part myself, since it basically reveals almost nothing, I just needed to show a boring, happy and ordinary life. All these long moments will be revealed at the very end, I promise!

Reply
secretdoorgaming80 days ago (3 edits)

I am very happy you are not offended by my words but take them with understanding and an open mind.  In that case if you want to change the entire thing or beginning, in my opinion only I would take the game down now before any more people try and play it as many folks may not come back to it later or it may not get as much audience.

Children do talk about meaningless things just as adults do also but keep in mind those who are going to play your game are not children but teens or adults and people get bored fast if a topic drags on for far too long.  If you're trying to portray children, make sure they speak properly some of the words these kids say in your paragraphs the words are too big for first graders to even understand what those words mean, keep it simple and don't try and be too descriptive.  Just let the words flow normally and make sure you have a beginning, middle and conclusion of your story that all ties together.  Good luck my friend I feel you will do a great job!  I would be happy to give it another try once you polish your game off. :)

Reply
niceed81 days ago

Still, I needed to show children who talk about some meaningless topics.

Reply
AboutFAQBlogContact us
Copyright © 2024 itch corp · Directory · Terms · Privacy · Cookies