Visual novels are interactive stories. They focus mainly on character development and plot rather than action and gameplay mechanics.
Dating sims (or dating simulations) are a video game subgenre of simulation games, usually Japanese, with romantic elements. The most common objective of dating sims is to date, usually choosing from among several characters, and to achieve a romantic relationship.
Set in a fictional universe, often (but not always) with fantastic or supernatural elements, alternate worlds, magic and monsters.
Either prominently containing or entirely themed around romance, this genre is typically focused on interpersonal romantic relationships between characters and the player.
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