Each new chapter goes so quickly because I cannot stop myself reading through it all at once.
Now I shall patiently await the next bit :)
KRSmith84
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A member registered Apr 14, 2024
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Overall, not bad, but there is room for improvement.
Most of the h-scenes feel the same, going about 4 or 5 times in a row, she's always "losing her mind," and (for me) too much of the ahegao face. It is almost every girl, every time.
What is the point of a harem if they all seem like the same (barring visuals)?
Also, you don't need a "a few moments later" screen for every transition. Let the writing speak for itself. If a character says, "We should be there by nightfall." Then the next screen can just be them arriving at night. We (the audience) will understand the implied passage of time. Save specific transition screens for large jumps, like when the story jumped ahead a few weeks while they were dealing with the dungeon outbreak (that worked very well).
There is a lot here that is good, and could be great. And of course, this is just one person's opinion; take it for what you will.
No matter what, keep going, keep writing, keep creating. :)
The Android story is really well done. There are moments in it that have me worried, sad, and happy, all at once.
Overall, the stories are very good. So many little touches and jokes that fit in nicely with the rest.
I was *dying* during Maria's "seduction training." Every time the situation grew, I found myself laughing louder.
Fantastic work, I hope the move went well, and I can't wait for the next segment.
...and if this is how much is in a 0.17 version, I cannot fathom how much will be here when it finally hits 1.0.
Can't wait.
There are some really cute, romantic, and funny story moments in this, so I am looking forward to the continuation of the story.
Oh, and how did I miss the "Star-Crossed Lover's" dream/scenes?
Suggestions/Wish-List:
- It would be nice to see some of the repeatable events slightly evolve as the relationships grow. Obviously, I don't mean whole new animations, but maybe slightly different endings. Maybe Cait starts to become more comfortable after some fun times and doesn't fully revert back into her shyness. Or becomes comfortable swallowing...
- Could there be a way to reset Lyriel's attitude when entering the PC's room in the mornings? I gave her a hard smack once, to see if she liked it more, and now she timidly enters every morning instead of barging in. She took the punishment too well....I don't want her scared all the time.
- Please make the Manga Club event somehow repeatable. That was....good.
Can't wait to see what ...comes... next!