A really tight little story that packs a punch.
I was impressed by the fluidity of your prose which was noticeable right away. I enjoyed the structure, which definitely made “the reveal” emotionally effective. The way Maxwell gets shut down right when he is at his most vulnerable was painful. The section with his sibling hit close to home, too. The relationship with his mother, as well. Stunning realism. I liked the inclusion of the instant messaging portion, it added an extra element of variety, and I always like seeing made-up usernames, ha ha…
Perfect first game, to me. Very quiet and somber. The dark color scheme was great too, the indistinct quality of the art that insinuates just enough detail hits home the decidedly blurry, bleak world of the feelings of our poor protagonist, which in turn infects the reader as well… :-)