Fantastic design, a bit sad the story was only “for fun”. I wanted some stakes ! :(
Eeuphy
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I think the writing start a bit slow at first but rapidly get you into it.
And I agree, sometimes… Silence happens and it’s a bit anticlimactic, but what the hell - even if I liked the music - I sometimes cut it to focus on the text instead.
Well not very spooky tho. Very rock’n’roll instead ^^’ (Yeahhhhh there were technically vampire - loved the dissertation btw)
There goes the vibes of cool kids ~ Loooove the writing, it was a blast, thank you ! Grinned a lot while reading.
…Even if, to be honest, I almost skipped the whole thing because of that start with Luka being a douche. You made that too well - urgh. Such an infuriating man.
(the background music and drawing were nice too of course, the magic was in the ensemble !)
((Got through your online stuff. I think I’ve fallen hard for your drawings, nomnomnami kind of “wow”, I’m a fan ; looking forward for more !))
It’s funny how I was initially thrown for a loop in the first few dialogues because I was expecting a girl love story… And it was of course !
I loved it. How “unconventional” the coolness/kindness of the cast was, especially Lucia - but the whole cast was highly huggable :3
Looking forward for more ! o/ If I had one critic to make is how the dragon-girl felt too bright for a ~500y old overpowered being. She hides her trauma’s so well it’s hard to tell she must have seen a lot of cherished ones come and go - or got bored doing most things. The “usual” tragedies of immortals ? I guess part of me needed a reason as to why she feels so “light-hearted” about life instead of. …Being bored or unattached (or guarded against attachment). I don’t know if I make sense >_<
I just started it and - well I’ll play it but there is some “obvious problem” (to me) : as preset the music is way stronger than the voices, making them kinda inaudible untouched. Setting the voice at highest Alice voice is lower than Sophie’s, making it a bit weird. Maybe some audio tweak would make it better ? Normalize or something ?
That’s it, back in the game now >_>
Wow, the designs of the background was godly. I sometimes paused on them and be like “hooo. Nice background” :<
The animation and sprite were pretty cute too.
If one thing was missing compared to the outstanding art, I thought it was the story (especially the one with the judge - I felt their relationship was a bit hollow), but still I found that the ex-lover branch was pretty endearing ! It was very hard to ignore her to complete the second ending >_>
Very nice ! Is that even a jam game ? Felt way too well polished to be one >_<
Yup, just did end it.
First I must say the craft (graphics/transition) were awesome. And the writing got me going. Great work.
Then (spoiler) I must say I’m dejected by how it turns out after the two first murders. I wanted some reconciliation with Grace so much all along, I felt a bit salty to be honest. I also wanted to see how Nils would use his inhuman powers to influence people’s buried emotions and tweak the Heaven society to something else.
So yeah. I guess I was really envisioning light after dark. Even the dimmest light.
Eating’s one heart, shredding a body, eating tongues or gauging eyes felt very over the top to me - but I thought they would be props for the opening of something “tried that, done that, now, what else ?” and instead they just flee after doing some mayhem ? It felt like an obnoxious slap of “nah, humans are crap” instead of my willy-nilly “human are what their environment make them do”, just tweak the context ! And when you got some angel with magic and can go into one’s head to know everything ? That’s playtime for some utopia right there (or some dystopia, but yet, something else than “vengeance” => “the end”).
Mah. Guess I’ll have to use my own brain to think about a more fitting ending to me. My cravings, my problems after all ! ^^’
Side note : I liked how Cerise was cute despite being in the shoes of the (albeit a bit of a caricature) bad guys. I also liked how she showed herself concerned and caring to Grace at first. Then everything get dismissed at being hypocrisy… But I feel like there could have been a lot more depth to her. You can be a true nazi and have sleepless nights because of your dog’s health after all. I felt like their last moment were a bit… Out of a cartoon, were people doing bad things are by essence bad people - which is not the most interesting place to be in.
Anyway, reading your afterword… I guess I get how “fleeing this piece of crap of toxic people” would be your conclusion if you lived it. Without magic - some destiny cheat - most situation isn’t salvageable alright. It’s just not… Very inspiring to me. I’m already too nihilistic about this, I want to dream another take >_<
These introverted and tired train-wreck heroines are the best somehow ; love & relatable Mia ^^
The weird capitalist AI on speaker reminded me of that futuristic story where fast-food restaurant RH are overtaken by AI (and everything else afterward) ; that and a mix with Portal for the mad side.
Dunno if you HAD to use the “shared dream” trope (it felt like a cheap story-trick without explanation) ; imho you could have just made it happen in real life ! (but I’m just nitpicking of course, all hail for your story it was good !) ^^’
I wonder why I still don’t get immune to theses run of the mill romance elements. I almost felt “hardened” at first against such a cliché setup (the chunbiyo playing inspector). But then the art and chatter made the rest and I found myself getting into it to the point of being a bit teary.
Fine. It was cool.
If the other are a bit like me, I guess the idea of criticizing/suggesting at authors we like feels a bit arrogant from mere players.
I’ve eventually realized that feedbacks are somehow scarce even for “the good stuff”, so I try to work out the “I’m not worthy to talk to them, I’m overjoyed to but what if I’m just wasting their precious time - AAAAH what have I done” complex >_<’
I’m usually only into lesbian stories but I like to be proven wrong. Thanks and… Looking forward to the sequel, I’m already a fan ;-)
I loved the constant choices at first (empoweriiing), but I loved it less on replays because it was… Pretty much 95% common route. It just doesn’t replays that well. :(
Anyway, that’s just details. My point is, the graphics are gorgeous (as anime fan). The romance romantic. The MC has this deathpan attitude I love. And got my gay Pinky Pie trying to have a girlfriend. Sweet :3
I think I’m into theses kind of setup at least, I love playing heroine, gay, and “unusual/not used much” viewpoint ; the disabled are one of them, and I really appreciate you did. The only VN I know featuring a girl in a wheelchair is “Flowers” (Erika - and it’s pretty good, I love her ! - but they didn’t play much on using facts on disabled, like the most related true life experience we get is her being helped at washing herself, and I don’t even think it’s how it’s done - the wheelchair is mostly a prop sadly).
But to me - the writing is paramount ; design, music, and everything is only a way to make the writing stand out more in the end.
But yeah, I’ll totally give it further try if you write stuff with heroines in the futures. I think no one should judge the quality of a writer on one go ; ebi-hime -for one- did write a tone of VN, half of them I hated, a third of them I cried over - almost felt like I was mislead at the end “who wrote this great… THE BAD AUTHOR I RESENT DID AAAAAAH I DON’T UNDERSTAND” :p
It was great. I let that one downloaded in version 1.1 on my desktop for months without daring to click it (I could see it would have been about kate - and kate was my favorite chara by far - so I was afraid to be too emotional tbh :o).
Anyway, I’ll re-download it in its last version for chapter 2 ! Because I WAAAAANT the next chapter.
Art is great, text is great ; I’m into it !
Text speed seem to be buggy ; wether the speed is set at “max” or “min” in the settings doesn’t change a thing ?
(EDIT : I’ll go and put my review, as I finished the VN since then. I feel like the realisation is fine, the sprites and background great… But I couldn’t “get” into the story, it felt off somehow, like if the people talking had no personality of their own ; I think the writing has a problem but I wouldn’t know how to correct it :(
It was… Surprisingly good. Not a fan of the story mechanic, I felt a lot of combinations didn’t change much, I ended up trying things randomly until I got the rest ^^’ (…35 days. I feel almost sorry for myself. Blind bruteforce is bad)
Still was kinda sweet. Wish there were a bit more of romance moment ! Or have you hidden secrets youuuu wouldn’t riiiight ? :3
Anyway, the drawings were cute, the side-stories didn’t always pan out relevant but had some insight to them.
Quality stuff !
…In place of the heroine I guess I would try more foolish decision tho. Like trying to say very embarrassing things knowing I wouldn’t need to assume them :p (reminds me of that one episode of Star Gate when the “perfect little soldier” loses his mind in the end and start the day by kissing his crush in front of all, and plays golf in the war room because why not !).
Thanks you for the thoughtful answer too - it always mesmerizing to have the luxury to be in contact with the makers of the stuff. <3
As writing goes, I’m pretty sure one has to make such decisions all the time, I get it (the fact it made me tear up in the end just talk for itself). In the end, I was only hinting on my own taste that I’d appreciate to be “along them” in the confusion about betrayal ; and instead was given a chair of a “I know better, silly them to fall for it awwww…”. ^^
Also I had a thought before sleep “I didn’t say anything about the backgrounds, the backgrounds were cool !”, so here you go.
The mechanic that really made it home, was (probably underused because it was hard to do ?) the chat prompt “start writing”, then… Nope, sending something else ! - To me it’s especially cool because it’s one of the few tricks that are exclusive to games (and it may be a first for me to see it used in a VN). Felt huge on the “feels real factor”, even if it was a one-time thing.
There’s also the “flow” in the chat too, but I wouldn’t know how to replicate that. Like how agonizing it can be to “wait” for an answer sometimes. It’s a major point of miscommunication out there, and the “X is writing…” of late made that mind-game probably even worse and addicting :p - it took me decades to chill about it, and I still get that imagination going haywire because X didn’t answer immediately - hence strategies like… The spamming of reassuring smileys sometimes. On the other hand, you were successful at featuring how things can get floody when both interlocutor are taken by the moment - by making it hard to read, pretty good !
Thinking about stuff I’d throw in, I’d say, maybe one ought to have more miscommunication ? Perplexing answers, failed jokes, and need for clarification is paramount in the chatbox ! Dunno if it could have been used efficiently as an addition ^^’
Last edit : now that I think about it, the subtle “desk soundbits” at the very beginning really added something imho, would have been a small plus to use them more as highlight at certain points. And now I feel like an ass for suggesting so much stuff as non-game-maker. Anyway ! Just saying it’s so cool as to make me try to contribute with some rambly thoughts, don’t you dare take it as “could do better”, t’was great and I’m just awkward about compliments !
And I so did ! Albeit - at the cost of my sleep schedule. 3am out here. Curseeee you !
Kinda inevitable tbh; as I’ve lived my best bits of friendship by texting on WoW at the time, I’m very vulnerable to that very setting (couldn’t get back in that zone since, sadly). Of course the fact that I’m a sucker at lesbian romance helped.
Thanks you a lot for the journey! Big thumbs up for the “natural” flow in the chat. The music felt nice (I’m keeping it on while writing this ~). The CGs felt a bit… Loooot more buffed than what I envisioned - from the sprite, but it still felt nice to have moar artwork at hand.
(spoil) If I had one reservation is how the gig was up like… Like… Maybe at 90% at their first encounter. Then the hints piles up onesidedly (bits and phrases are all over the place), and it felt a bit unnatural for them not to pry a little into it. But maybe it’s the writer’s intent, I guess a lot of drama use the obvious quiproco thing.
Aaaaand I would also say that… Well. The first “I love you” made my eyes glisten but. They do say it a lot. They have like. A cartoonish confidence suddenly. May be the hormonal buff. Okay, maybe it works.
Critic fail at criticizing ! Done ! Bruuuh