itch.io

"Do not play"? You expect me not to play a game on a website that is designed entirely around that very premise? The gall! The gumption! The cheek, the nerve, THE AUDACITY! If I was the Lord that Ruled Over All I would have you summarily executed for such BLASPHEMOUS and frankly INSANE ideas? Do not play? I FORSAKE THY FOUL TONGUE AND SUBSTITUTE AN IMPETUS OF MY OWN!

I'M NOT ALLOWED TO LOOK AT ANIME! MUM SAID! GOD!

LET ME FUCK THE DRAGON.

one time i drank at least half a bottle of cough syrup to get high off of the DXM and it looked EXACTLY like this. 

this one is good actually

there is nothing cozy about labour! this game lacks the inherent political narrative that is ESSENTIAL to truly deliver a moving tale that deals with the exploitation and class consciousness of those that work in the agricultural industry! also, no support for the n64 controller, what the hell?

god that one wasn't very good, sorry. god. sorry. i just fucked it up again. sorry. fuck.

zom wick? yea i sure hope he does

last man standing? wow. you are so getting cancelled. i've sent the kamala harris deathsquad to your house and george soros himself will perform your beheading. 

obviously just a ripoff of bloons td6. shameful really.

WHY WONT YOU LET ME SPEND MONEY ON THESE GAMES? WHY DO YOU HATE ME? IS IT BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE? IS IT BECAUSE I FRITTERED AWAY MY YOUTHFUL YEARS, AND NOW TIME TRICKLES ACROSS MY WEATHERED FINGERS LIKE THE FLEETING RAYS OF A DISTANT SUNSET? I YEARN FOR A TIME THAT I CAN'T REMEMBER, A VERSION OF MYSELF THAT I'LL NEVER ONCE BE AGAIN. THERE ARE TOO MANY YEARS, TOO MANY DAYS, BUT NEVER ENOUGH MOMENTS TO CHERISH. I WEEP FOR THE CHILDREN BORN INTO THIS DOOMED WORLD; I GORGE MYSELF ON DELICACIES YET THEY CRUMBLE TO ASH ON MY TONGUE.

0/10 I KEEP PUTTING MY CREDIT CARD NUMBERS INTO THE SCREEN AND NOTHING HAPPENS

ugh! this game is filled with too much whimsy! i simply cannot abide this! 

yours truly,

xenitos #1 hater

I AM XENTIOS #1 HATER AND I AM HERE TO SAY THIS GAME FUCKING SUCKS!!!!! THERE'S NO MICROTRANSACTIONS, NO BATTLEPASS, AND ALSO I AM FOND OF DOGS SO I THINK THIS GAME IS HIGHLY BIASED!!!!!