My favorite part of the game was allowing me to cry. I felt so lost and I just loved that the game acknowledged that potential feeling and give an option for me to feel frustrated and telling me that I could keep going. I think that right there encapsulated the theme so beautifully that I didn't quite expect.
The beginning was written pretty well, but you did have to wade through a lot before you could do anything which sort of put me on autopilot read mode without getting to really put myself in it. I think just a few choices in the beginning, even if they don't branch or have a huge effect on the game, would force me to slow down and just absorb the setting a bit. But once you got to exploring the ship , I was surprised at how detailed you designed the geography of the ship. There were constant stakes and obstacles in each area, which forces you to think a little bit about how you approached getting off the ship.
But as I said, I did get lost, which was fine at first, but then I just kept going into a loop over and over of things I'd already done. I think this could be alleviated by graying out options you've already explored. But just amazed at how you were able to accomplish all this design beyond just the writing.
AlbertLeo
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The best thing about the game is its mood and tone. The way the prose centers on the main character easily sets up that noir vibe and when combined with subtle sound design, like a monotonous tone in the background, adds to the sort of this world that feels oppressive. There's obviously a lot of care that was put into the world building. I just kind of wished I understood a bit more. What may feel fleshed out in your head and taken for granted for the character because this is their world, may be a little harder to grasp for the player. For example, in the beginning, we know you have a job, OSI, but we don't know the acronym, or what they do as an organization, or your role other than doing paperwork. I often felt like I was just taken along for the ride, but sometimes didn't know the stakes, or where I was going or why. But I understand that's a challenge to do without doing expo dumps. One way to hide that is to have an interaction with a character who hates who you are, and explain with contempt about what it is that you actually do or what they think you do.
As for the gameplay, this could be a stylistic choice, but using ellipsis as a dialogue option could be interpreted in so many ways, which made it a bit hard to know the implication of what that choice could mean. Obviously, to not say something is a choice, but if you're only given two choices, and one of them, I didn't know what it meant, that felt a bit limiting or impactful. But some of the dialogue and writing outside of the choices were quite fun to read.
Very impressive how you all were able to breathe life into a fascinating space in such a short amount of time.
Hey I'm Albert,
I LIKE MANIPULATING WORDS.
About me: I have a masters in screenwriting where I wrote a lot of screenplays and did some development work at some studios. I was also selected to be part of the ArenaNet narrative mentorship program. In my day job, I work as an editor for people writing stories about themselves.
I've done a couple jams before, my last one was ranked community favorite. My favorite parts of narrative design are working with other disciplines to infuse narrative and solving problems.
My favorite genres are sci fi and fantasy, but love mixing genres and tones. I love world building and dialogue. Most of my work sprinkles in bits of humor while probing the unexpected, but I'm open to collaborating with people. I'm looking for a team. You can find me on Discord: albert_leo
Well, that was a mood I wasn't expecting! I really appreciated the depiction of mental health and supporting each other. I didn't quite understand jumping the spiders, the hitbox of how to land on them seemed inconsistent. The negativity bubbles were a bit fast to read, which I guess is maybe the point that at some point you have to ignore it and rise above it?
The music was delightfully soothing, though I thought the nightmare music could have been a little darker and faster tempo to contrast. Didn't think I'd say this, but the tumbling pillow animation was pretty well done. I felt like there was a missed opportunity to add more narrative to understand who Dewie is. Maybe little hints as to what his nightmares are about, or maybe whenever you closed a door, you learned something about how he conquers that fear.