Realy nice story, Good renderings, Excelent pacing. Until you reach the last scene with Elizabeth. In a few sentences the protagonist goes from a clever nice dominant guy, to someone that has to use threats to dominate. At this point he is no better than Bob. For me that spoiled the benign mood and I was actualy glad it ran out of content at that point. PLEASE rewrite that scene or change the parameters required to trigger it.
Viewing post in Maid to Please [Demo] comments
correct it is the main scene right before the massage. There is a dispute between the Protagonist and Beth about there respective places in the household. The Protagonist resorts to threatening Beth. I have played it both with a mixed Submissive/Affection selection and latest with a pure Affection route and no Submission at all. Same scene both ways.
Interesting. I guess it shows how people can read the same text and draw different conclusions. The intent on my part was that it's playful/teasing and can lead into romance/affection, or be reinforced if you chose the submissive route.
Thanks for the feedback, it's always interesting to hear how a player interprets my writing.