I usually try to avoid any political comments, but this one is too tragic, so I had to create an account as well, just to reply to this comment. However, I am somewhat reluctant to continue the political part of it, which is, unfortunately, the biggest part of my thoughts. So, dear Caribdis, I would like to ask your permission to do that.
In the meantime I will just say that I hope you will be fine. I do understand your feelings, I had similar thoughts (about suicide) in February, but I just moved on, even though devastated for some time. There are things worth living for, even if it does not seem so. That is what kept (and still keeps) me alive.
Stay safe, mate
Edit: It has been a couple of hours now since my reply, and I now realized that talking about politics would be wrong, so I am not doing it. I just hope you will be fine. That is all that matters now.