Well i'm not trying to defend 50 Shades. I don't like it either. I'm just saying that hardcore view of BDSM is so popular because it caught on as the way a lot of people want to see BDSM. I'm not into it, so I don't defend. All I can say is Nothing is Forever, does a better job making the Dominatrix seem like a better person and just so happens to have issues that make her into that kink. That's your best bet for a better take on it. But as for me, I will never be into it.
No. I don't think I like the sound of that either. Whether or not a person is into soft or hardcore BDSM,it often has nothing to do with any trauma. I'm not sure I want to try Nothing Is Forever because from the way it's worded it treats the BDSM kink like its tied to being mentally ill or being a villain. Not a fan of the trope that tries to explain a character's kink by going oh' x has this trauma or mental issues, so they have this kink!' That's kind of lazy,not to mention very rarely true IRL. Another reason why I don't care for Fifty Shades.I think you have a point that maybe the public needs to be exposed to softer BDSM for a bit to get them to understand. Thanks for trying,but I don't think I'll be checking that out. I'll sticking with reading Sunstone.
Deb in NIF is not scarred as far as I can tell. She just guarded. Always wanted to be in control and idolized. Tough. She has not even done any whipping or pain stuff in my save files. She just wants you to pamper her and tend to her needs while addressing her as an authority figure. Slowly working her way up to bondage and maybe some humiliation or painplay. But for the most part she is a women bored with most vanilla sex. If not all. The villain of the game is KIM. Not DEB. Deb is just bored with her sex life with her lover but still loves him as a person. They try an open relationship and she asks the MC to be her sub. That's then is up to you where that goes. She dommes you now and then and you can let it escalate or take it slow. KIM on the other hand is a bad girl character is dabbles into sociopathic traits. Wanting to be the winner and sneaky all the time. Using double talk and lawyer level blackmail to trick people into situations. She cheats often but never gets caught. The MC chooses to be her minion and let her use them or tell on her or stay out of her love life with his best friend.