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"I'm forgetting something. Right, food."

and he waltzes in like he owns the place, no tables were free so naturally he walked up to one of the tables, scared the shit out of the people sitting so they would leave and then he sat down perfectly content with all his life choices

"..And you act like im crazy."

Bloop, he sat down. /P

"uh- don't group me with you. The only thing I'm crazy for is sustenance AKA food. Who needs anything else in life? Other than brutal murder of course."

"You practically shoved a bowl of nachos in a babys face. T-T"

"The baby was taking up my space, that tiny devil-spawn deserved it, plus his face was ugly which made the fact that he was sitting here more offensive. Now don't judge me unless you want the same treatment."

"You have no nachos to use, and if you even flick a crumb on me i'll chop your dick off."

"...you so much as breathe the same air as me and I'll make sure you don't se nothing but the firey pits of hell for the rest of your miserable immortal dead life and then when I eventually die and join you an old man I'm gonna make sure your afterlife is shittier than the ATLA movie and all the fucking shitheads of the world combined, see how you like me then you dipshit, dumbass motherfucker, ninnyhammer, simple ass lookin bitch."

"..Said three things relating to ass, you try insulting me about the way I like blood earlier which isn't an insult, you look like a rip-off of Jevil if he was an inbred, and your eyes looked like you we're born from a mountain lion if your mother was a Zooophile. Oh, and don't forget the fact your insults go as far as hell, which I would be looking-forward to go too."

“fyi my “mother” is a bitch so thank you for insulting her, I don’t look like Jevil, I look more like a rip-off Grinch so you’re wrong, I’m surprised no one ever decided to call me that like cmon, and my eyes are none of your business. The last one is understandable. Also I’m not insulting you, I’m threatening you. There’s a difference. Sorry, you must not understand anything I’m saying, I’ll explain it in small words for you. You are brain small.”

"And perhaps you shouldn't be so closed-minded when it comes to sarcasm, my good sir, Must I explain into detail what it is, or shall I just bring you to the ground with me, I'm more than capable of making us two-"

...THE HELL DID HE GET A PIPE BOMB FROM-!?

"...Go boom~"