Look I know I said I would leave but… I kinda need to tell someone rn then I’ll be out the door never to return okay? Okay. So I was busy, getting my life together as I said I would. And I started thinking about some drawing ideas I really wanna do. For context I’m currently on vacation with a small portion of my family. No one my age there though. None of my friends either. Our favorite cafe got changed into a sushi place. The best place to go for pizza or a calzone had hired a new chef who had no idea what they were doing unlike the very professional old chef. Since there’s none of my friends I can’t go have fun or whatever because it’s more fun with someone else but everyone just wants to sit down and do jack sh1t. Now the best thing ever happened. I wake up at midnight and my underwear feels wet… “god fucking damn it.” I got my period. To add some ✨D E P R E S S E D✨ fondant on the cake of 💀B O R E D O M💀 iced with a big layer of 👽A N X I E T Y👽 here’s a fake convo and then thought process that actually happened for fuck’s sake 👹
“Do you remember when your grandma died.”
“Yes. I also remember my grandpa, my favorite uncle and my favorite aunt.”
“So every death that happened in your family since you were born correct?”
“Yes.”
“Can you explain them in detail?”
~short silence~
“…Yes.”
“Ok start with your grandma.”
“Well when I heard the news my mom was leaving because my grandma had died me and my sisters couldn’t keep it together at all. So we stayed together. I copied one of them thinking it could make me feel better… that plan backfired.”
“How so?”
“Well she ran into a room then ran out so I did too. Before I left the room I heard her talking about how I was annoying and how she… didn't like me.”
“Ok. I see and how did you react when your grandpa died?”
~silence~
“…I didn’t. I kinda… sat there. Same with my uncle. I just sat there feeling sorry for myself like some loser. I was heart broken of course but there was no actual reaction. When my aunt died I was just… angry.”
“Ok thank you that’s all.”
(Btw this all sounded like a tape recording in my head so ye and I was boutta go out with my sisters so they get up whisper a bit then walk out forgetting I exist. Here comes the thought process.)
Oh. I guess they forgot about me x4
I can still catch up with them if I go now and ask why they left. If they say I looked sad just roll your eyes at them. Whatever you do don’t mention anything.
(Insert me getting up and looking around)
What direction did they go? Doesn’t matter. i know their meeting place. There’s no one here they must have gone to do something… without me. I think my sister said she wanted a bagel earlier. Maybe they’re there.”
(Goes to bagel place)
Who am I kidding. They’re not coming. I should just go home. Don’t cry stop being a baby you're in public.
(Insert me going home laying on the bed and somehow not crying even though I really fricking wanted too.)
-and scene-
So there’s the context. And I’m thinking of drawing ideas so I can feel better.