hi kaz!
I think the pacing is great — not too rushed or too slow, although I did find myself craving slightly more detail sometimes. This is in part because your narration has some slight similarities to the original text (retrospective framing, sharing bits of knowledge in advance that the character doesn't know yet), and that primed me for a similar writing style — however, I may be in the minority on this! The introduction wasn't too rushed for me, although if you want to give the POV character a more distinct voice or personality, that would be a good place to expand. No pressure to do that, though, as I think a relatively blank slate POV character works well here.
- jess