Thank you for all this. Sincerely.
More bugs:
There seems to be a whole mechanic in the bathroom about being able to take a shower, and to possibly catch your roommate/sibling in the bathroom. The logic for this is messed up because all of the "set $showeroccupied" calls are using "==" instead of "=", preventing you from even taking a shower in the first place.
Lines like these:
set $showeroccupied == false set $showeroccupied == true
Should be:
set $showeroccupied = false set $showeroccupied = true
Worked like a charm when I find-replaced all instances of "set $showeroccupied == " with "set $showeroccupied = "