Ok, time to convey my thoughts into words, let’s see if I’m able to express my ideas on this entrance.
The first and most evident thing to say, this submission is very ambitious; judging by the great amount of sprites, beautiful drawn backgrounds, diverse set of CGs, and the word count scratching the cap for the Jam, quite impressive you were able to make all this in the lapse of one month and with consistent art direction that mixed everything together into a cohesive world.
Now, however, I won't deny that the word limit didn’t play a handicap over the narration, this story still has things to say, but due to the limit, it needed to cut some parts, affecting the plot and cohesiveness in some crucial parts of the story, like the final part where Kameron wanted to go before seeing Ryley being honored by the Devah (Sorry if I wrote it wrong, I don’t quite remember the title) by using the excuse of ‘Wanting that the last memory of him is he being happy.’ Cute and everything, but wouldn’t he be happier while being crowned, thus having a better memory of him?
As I said, this probably is due to the word limit instead of an illogical decision from the characters.
The implementation of the conlag (constructed language) is the most impressive feat of the game, it would be stupid to deny the fact. However, it seemed to drag a bit up the mid part of the game. I know about the existence of the dictionary, and trying to decipher the language as if you were a sort of linguist could be very fun, and it would add an extra layer to the game, but I can’t help to think that part of the responsible for the lack of space in the prose is due to implement part where the characters speak in this wicked version of Zypanese. Those who are not that interested in roleplaying as epigraphers, will surely skip those parts that they can’t understand, but due those parts also counts for the word limit, they will see a decrease of consumable content they can understand.
The characters were a bag of mixed success. First, Kameron and Ryley’s relationship quite feels a bit rushed, having two sex scenes in the lapse of two days, but that just be me, I guess. Cody felt more like a plot device rather than a character by himself, he was just the translator for Kameron and Ryley in those moments where they can’t convey their ideas, being able to learn the language at a more than acceptable level in less than 3 days.
The Crow and the Tanuki (I can't remember their names for the sake of my life, I’m sorry) were just there? They pretty much can’t talk with you, so it’s difficult to care for them.
However, arguably, I’d say that Eugene’s party was the best of the game. First, Eugene as Ryley’s rival is first depicted as the impossible barrier, the sworn obstacle on the good side’s path that must be defeated in a final epic battle, just to actually speak with him and notice that he’s just a nice guy, maybe a bit snarky, but good overall. An amazing subversion of expectations, that, actually, puts us on the bad side, with Ryley cheating and trying to summon an old evil to win the competition by any means, that also works perfectly by putting him under a new light. Yes, he’s determined and hard working, but until what point was he actually trying, and instead trusting that he has an unworldly power able to defeat everybody on his path?
Lou was also a great addition, having a parallelism with Kameron’s story, he also had his otherworld romance with Saya, affecting him in a similar way by having the best moments of his life ripped away due to the impossibility of actually being able to live in that world, a tragic ending. And he (seemingly) didn’t have a reunion at the end with his love interest, which, unlike Kameron, makes the conclusion of his plot more significant.
And Saya… OK, the reason I like her is for headcannons of she having a strap-on and pegging Lou until mental breakdown in their last day together rather a concise show her real self, but again, the parallelism of their stories with Kameron and Ryle is quite strong, and the moment of she and Lou touching their horns in a show of affection was the cutest scene of the story, I won’t hear any argument against.
With all this said, I really enjoyed the game, it brings a lot of interesting concepts to the table, and I wouldn't mind seeing the aftermath of the story in a short continuation to fully understand the implications of Ryley now being in that other world. I hope I haven’t come across as too critical, this game was such a delight to play, and pretty much everything I haven’t mentioned are things I enjoyed, like the music or the UI. Anyways, excellent job, maybe I’ll give a try to your other stories to see what kind of amazing stuff your mind has been cooking.