I can't really say much about the content of the update, but the English translation so far is really really rough. The original content had some oddities here and there that could be forgiven, but Luo Luo'ai's update has so many more issues.
Viewing post in 英王的宝冠 / Coronet of the Sagacious Lord comments
Sure thing. First of all, let me say I'm still grateful there's a translation at all.
I'll just list some things here, starting on the new content:
"I frown. The indescribably strange sensation at the back of my head makes me hard to calm down." I would probably write it more like "The indescribably strange sensation at the back of my head makes it hard to stay calm." Saying "makes me hard to calm down" is just odd phrasing, you wouldn't say that about yourself. You could replace it with "makes it hard to calm down," using "it" instead of "me," and it would sound better, too. The current phrasing makes it sound like he's currently panicking, but the dialogue makes him sound more annoyed or inconvenienced than panicking.
There are a few spacing issues after punctuation, sometimes names aren't capitalized, sometimes words are capitalized when they shouldn't be. There's an instance of Yan Liaoliao having the "Maa" phrase that only Jiang Bolao has had so far.
Jiang Bolao has two instances of him saying "I find it!" rather than "I found it!"
"To be honest, it's an once-in-a-lifetime oppurtunity, it's such a pity to abandon it." The first one is forgivable, but it's "a once-in-a-lifetime," not an. That's just to do with how "once" is pronounced, whether you use 'a' or 'an' and it's a very understandable mistake. However, "oppurtunity" is just misspelled.
Same with "procrustination" later on.
"I can almost felt flames blazing in his eyes as he said those words." A lot of the issues are with tense, so it would be "feel" over "felt."
"I feel like I should speak something:" -> "I feel like I should say something:"
"But quarreling can't get us anywhere, right?" -> "But quarreling won't get us anywhere, right?"
"Then why does he joined the resistance?" -> "Then why did he join the resistance?"
I could keep going, but from what I've played so far, the translation is just full of stuff like that: issues with tense, phrasing, and spelling. I don't have the time to go through the entire script and check everything, though. Some of them are very understandable mistakes because English is really difficult, but some of the issues are mistakes that a spelling checker would catch. I don't know how the translation team is set up, but it seems like you need someone that is a native English speaker that can help fix issues like these, alongside the dual Chinese and English language speakers translating.
Again, I'm grateful we can read the visual novel at all, but the quantity of mistakes makes it difficult to fully enjoy it as it is meant to be enjoyed right now. It's still overall enjoyable, and the content and ideas behind the text are still good and can be understood, for the most part. I mean no disrespect towards the current translation team and their efforts, but it just needs someone to look over it all and clean things up.