SPOILERS FOR ENDING 12, LIKE SERIOUSLY IN DEPTH SPOILERS THAT PROBABLY ALSO SPOILS OTHER ENDGAME CONTENT
This was the ending i got, and i sat on it for a bit and I'm just curious to discuss it.
Normally, I love happy endings- nine times out of ten any other kind of ending makes me feel unsatisfied or that a story amounted to nothing, but here the opposite kinda happened.
I just want to clarify, I am NOT artistic- it is a slow, painful process for me, (one i wish to improve,) and so I am NOT trying to imply my thoughts are correct or even really offer criticism, as I don't believe I can offer anything of actual value- I just wanna put my thoughts where other people have also experienced the same game (since idk anyone else who has played this.)
The reason I personally felt more unsatisfied with a happy ending this time is it just... felt abrupt for me. I've sacrificed myself, I put my trust in Esra, I chose to save everyone- no exceptions, and as I had one final exchange with Esra I expected my character to die- I felt tears welling up in the corners of my eyes, ready to have a satisfying cry, assuming I might get some afterlife narration of my deeds, maybe even a reunion with Ash as it all fades away- only to be abruptly pulled out of a simulation. And I was... pretty pissed. I'm sorry to say I thought the cheapest, easiest ending was chosen- akin to it "all being a dream." I expected that nothing I did actually mattered, but i stuck around to explore what was left of the game, and when I got to the books (a bit of unintentional foreshadowing it seems judging from a previous comment) I realized it was all fake, and I thought that was.. cool. I spoke to Esra again, chose to fight for life, and yeah, I was brought back, and I thought it was cute. But it kind of felt like the endings of the books in the simulations- rushed, and implausible, or rather unearned, as the solution was just "There's a solution!" I'm not against ending 12 being happy, but I just feel like I didn't have time to ride my emotions before the simulation, and the resurrection just felt like it was a thing that happened, with little buildup or.. I guess earning.
That all being said though, the game is fantastic. I was addicted to the loop (played on hard) and I loved the character writing, as I felt like I really did care about everyone I met (especially esra, you knocked it out of the park with her). I just wanted to discuss how i felt with something- be it someone else who reads this or just the "post reply button," and again I want to state this is not criticism or me talking down on the game in any way, the issue probably lies with me.
I will be eagerly checking out anything else you have made and will make
edit: oh I forgot to mention, I'll probably go and get the other endings someday, but i usually need to take a break from a game after getting an ending as otherwise they don't feel impactful for me.