Heya brother, life is an undetermined variable for everyone. Nobody is perfect, so don't stress over things you can't be blamed for. You're still living, you're still breathing, and you're still staying true to yourself and your endeavors. To be fair, there's nothing more you can ask for, and you should be proud of where you are today. We can wait, you just focus on stabilizing your livelihood, and we'll be awaiting your arrival with open arms. :)
Stay safe, yeah? Keep hanging in there. :D