I do think it would be interesting to keep the beginning as it so that we, the readers can see your writing develop as we continue along the story, or tweak it when the story is finished if you want your writing to seem more even throughout. I hope you are able to finish making this story and be proud of what you created regardless of your choice. That being said this is one of my favorite IFs ever, and I love your writing style! <3 If I ever end up making an IF, just know that you were and inspiration!
(^-^)/