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Thelightsmen162 days ago

I really liked this one!

The story seemed insteresting from the very start, I got really curious as to what and why everything was happening in the game considering the way everything in the life of the main character seemed so awfully wrong yet completely normalized.

The dialogue is not half bad either! All the conversations you have with Daisy feel natural and not like they're reading a script, so I enjoyed reading them.

For the characters,  the game does a good job at giving the Main character a defined personality, same with the chubby mouse girl, she looks like a sweetheart!

I also appreciate the artstyle and design used for this project, it sells the idea of weirdness very well.

My only criticisms would be:

  • To further proofread the dialogues, because I found a few typos here and there. 
  • Add more interactable objects (With usually the MC talking about whatever you interact with)
  • Remove the unnecessary promts (where you can only choose one option and that's it) and only keep the ones where you actually have more than one option.
  • Add more pictures/sprites, etc showing off the monsters designs!
  • Add more events like the tinder app section, and overall more events that involve more than just moving from point A to B.
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Brittle Lizard162 days ago

Thanks for playing! The criticisms are mostly things I've already thought about, but I didn't have time to adjust them for the demo. The final game is planned to have more art and environmental interactions in general, and I've already fixed at least some of the typos for the next demo version.

I want the more "gamey" sections like the dating app to be spread out to break up the monotony of just reading and moving around, though. It's not really meant to be a gameplay-first game that happens to have an underlying story as much as it's meant to be a narrative you move through that happens to have a few minigames. It's unlikely that I'll have more than one or two in the span that this demo covers.

There's a storytelling reason for the single dialogue options to exist, but they definitely need to be adjusted to make it clearer. It's not super well-defined yet.

I appreciate your feedback! I didn't think we'd get any with how late it was submitted.

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