I played with this lovely person as Phont Maulch, the normalest of columnists. NOT A COMMUNIST.
Here is an excerpt from his deep deep thoughts:
Standards for workplace safety, are we focusing on the right things?
The workplace is like a home in many ways, a big family. Sometimes you find out that your wife is just like the OSHA inspector for example, telling you to stop eating pipes. Well, dear reader, what you'll agree with is that it is the fruit of communist propaganda. If your wife starts telling you what to eat, remind her that those pipes are what keeps things RUNNING in this house.