Hmmm... Not' sure I understand the symbolism of this one. Like, I get she's going on a long trip to be changed, but wonders if she should go back at first out of worrying that she no longer will be loved. Yet understood that Saturn may not be what she thinks it would be but wants to see it anyway because she loves it a lot? But yet hasn't ever really seen it in person to know she does yet isn't worry it could shatter her own expectations? I'm not sure if it's conflicting or a facet that she isn't aware of until it hits her later and she decides to go back after the understanding hits?