I had this problem when I was running v1.14 on Quest. I made sure to uninstall v1.14, then installed v1.15, and now multiplayer works great! I've been able to play via private room with a friend who is also on Quest. I also played with random people via random room, but don't know what headset they were on.
It may be a nice addition if you could see the type of headset and where in the world the person is when you see them in the lobby.