"His bed seemed to be unmade, but that was hardly unusual. Ignoring what should have been a red flag, Shugo crawled into bed." This line sounds like it's saying "Everything was normal, he should have noticed." It makes more sense with the previous line about the door being shut, but it's a bit confusing since only this text appears on that screen.
"...both girls sporting names just as abnormal as their magic." Satou and Masume sound perfectly normal though in a setting of Japanese names.
The storyline of the witch attacking them and the hearing about the one behind it all was very cool, hoping you continue the story!
Cool story with a cute art style! Overall an interesting premise with magic in modern society. Character interactions between Shugo and Satou were well done, would be curious to learn more about the others in future episodes.
There were a number of spots in the game where the text auto advances without the user's input which caused me to miss some lines. Might be worth checking to see that proper page breaks are in place. A couple times a few lines rendered at the same time, causes flashing text as well.
Neat story, love the opening screen graphic. I included it in part 1 of my TyranoBuilder Summer Jam 2015 compilation video series, if you'd like to take a look :) https://youtu.be/xPfEoLY5flk
Comments
(2/2)
Two odd points that struck me:
The storyline of the witch attacking them and the hearing about the one behind it all was very cool, hoping you continue the story!
Cool story with a cute art style! Overall an interesting premise with magic in modern society. Character interactions between Shugo and Satou were well done, would be curious to learn more about the others in future episodes.
There were a number of spots in the game where the text auto advances without the user's input which caused me to miss some lines. Might be worth checking to see that proper page breaks are in place. A couple times a few lines rendered at the same time, causes flashing text as well.
(1/2)
Neat story, love the opening screen graphic. I included it in part 1 of my TyranoBuilder Summer Jam 2015 compilation video series, if you'd like to take a look :) https://youtu.be/xPfEoLY5flk