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You are a criminal bear with two stats: CRIMINAL and BEAR.

They are out there, and they are hunger for our blood.

Die alone in some godforsaken forest.

If you're quick enough, you can eat all the canapes before anyone notices you're a farm animal.

Kiss a beautiful orc boy while the world burns.

They’re out to get us, and we must escape.

Fall in love, drink blood, and get in trouble.

Goatgirls. Ratboys. Bin Wizardry. Steal from the trash and stab anyone who tries to stop you.

Diplomacy so powerful it destroys a small town.

You're a bunch of raccoons trying to drive a car.

You're an incompetent scout trapped in ancient and hungry woods.

Fight crime! Rectify injustice! Piss off the cops!

You're on a big adventure, but your head keeps falling off.

High school is difficult enough without transforming into a giant monster.

Steal stuff off a wizard, but not in a dramatic "level 20" sort of way

A game of magic, woodland creatures, and brutal murder.

Go mad and die as you attempt, in vain, to hunt down a creature that lives on the edge of your dreams.

Wake up or die trying.

Delve within an ancient forest