Posted April 01, 2020 by Enygmatic
Hey all, I'm here today to happily announce that we are adding a new way to play OUT OF ORDER!
I've been listening to my fans' feedback, and the one common complaint both of them had was that there simply wasn't enough content to the game! Naturally my first reaction was to ban them, but then I remembered I don't qualify for unemployment. After careful consideration I decided to kill two birds with one stone, with a new feature I think saps players of all skill levels will enjoy!
The new and improved Microgouging DLC will allow players to unlock new content and upgrades by leaving the game running in the background! The idle game genre is something I've always wanted to experiment with, seeing as how it's the closest thing gaming has come to reaching our own equivalent of Citizen Kane, and I think Out Of Order is the perfect vehicle to drive that innovation. You simply need to maintain a constant internet connection and you can progress while you depress! You don't even need to worry about creating an account, the malware bleeding edge technology required to register you for this program comes straight out of the box with the Out Of Order zip file!
Now I know what you're probably thinking: "But how will I be able to earn all of this unique and important content if I need to always be online? With everyone stuck at home my internet is garbage!" Well I'm sure Ajit Pai is doing everything he can to support your internet service provider, but in the meantime we got you covered ;).
I understand that many people don't have the time to enjoy my masterpiece, so to alleviate the FOMO, you can instead bypass the 20-200 hour waiting time by paying a small fee! The prices have been carefully balanced to ensure that "pay-to-win" does not become the norm, ideally everyone should lose when playing this game.
Enough chit-chat though, here's a small glimpse of the new content you can expect to see in the first installment of the Out Of Order content road-map!
P.S. In all seriousness I am still working on Episode 2, it'll just take another couple months