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A jam submission

HummingBird HauntingView game page

Then the HummingBird sees me. #HBHtwine
Submitted by Naomi Norbez (call me Bez) (@NaomiNorbez) — 21 hours, 28 minutes before the deadline
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HummingBird Haunting's itch.io page

Results

CriteriaRankScore*Raw Score
Staying true to the source material#44.0834.083
Polish#73.4173.417
Graphics#113.6673.667
Overall#123.0693.069
Most innovative use of the source material#133.0833.083
Fun#142.6672.667
Sound#191.5001.500

Ranked from 12 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.

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Comments

Neat story. Love the hand drawn graphics! I included it in part 1 of my Public Domain Jam 2 compilation video series, if you would like to check it out :) https://youtu.be/xbZmIYuD92U

Developer

@DeliInteractive: Glad you enjoyed the game and its art. Gonna see what I can do with the sound. And Twine is not limited in that regard! My last Twine game, HCF, has music and voice-acting. Glad you'll be checking that out! :D

@antstiller: That's a good branch idea. A bit late now, though, but still a nice touch I could have made.

Submitted

@norbez Ah, now that I know how you did the art I love it even more! With regards to a branch, I would have put one where you could either select The Levitator or The Hummingbird and it was just a pic of the hummingbird from a different angle. And then the branch merges back. Just a small, simple thing.

Submitted

Very charming hand-painted artwork. Always appreciate seeing traditional media in games. Short simple and to the point! I'm not super familiar with the work on which it is based, but it was an enjoyable little experience all on its own. I would agree that it could have benefited from maybe some ambient sounds or the fluttering sounds of a humming bird, but I'm not sure if that's just a limitation of Twine or not since I haven't made much in the engine. Still, very nice work; I'll definitely be checking out some of your other Twine stuff as well when I get the chance!

Developer

@andyman404 and @Kara Jane: Thanks a ton, guys! :D

@doonboddy: Glad you appreciated the art, man. And wow, adding hummingbird noises is a great idea. I'm going to look into that!

@Six Down Studios: Yeah, I like those colors too. Painting the game was tons of fun, and I'm glad you like the traditional art! Also, thanks for the comment reply on your game. Haven't gotten back to it yet, but I definitely will. :)

Submitted

Oh, looks like you've already rechecked my game page! Thanks for that!

You can disregard the second part of my comment :)

Submitted

Very clever interpretation of the theme! Traditional art in a gamejam game is very refreshing, and the poetry works nicely with the illustration (I especially love the colors of the painting on page 2. Good onya for using a lesser known source too.

By the way, I responded to your question about my game regarding the clues. My original instructions were somewhat lacking, so I quite appreciated the comment :)

Submitted

I'm kind of new to playing Twine games. This is probably only the second or third one I've played, but your game definitely has more art than I've seen in the others and I appreciate that. There's a lot you can say with text alone, but sometimes it's just nice to have a picture in there and I find it adds to my experience. Like some others have said, I enjoyed the water colors.

I read the poem quick before playing this, and you seemed to hit the nail on the head. I also like the twist you added to the end making it about the creator of the hummingbird and not the actual hummingbird. I would have liked some hummingbird tweets or hummingbird fluttering noises -- I found it interesting that neither the original poem nor your game dealt with what the hummingbird sounds like.

Submitted

I love the watercolor style art and the story is nice and cute. I can see how it borrows from the source material, though you have given it your own spin/interpretation. Good job :)

Submitted

A sweet and beautiful little illustrated poem! Well done.

Developer

@JohansenIndustries: Yeah, I didn't know about the poem either before the jam. I ruffled around gutenberg and found this. Hilda Conking's collection is also quite good, from what I read. Also, glad you mentioned the meaning. :D

@Dante: Glad you enjoyed it. A lot of people who played it (irl) said this was a "cute" game, and I see you also think so! :)

Developer

@Galejade: Hmm, that's an interesting idea!

Submitted

Nice! I didn't know about the poem either. The art is very charming and suits your text well. As some have said before, I was also wondering about multiple paths... or maybe something that would make the text react more to the player's input. When I saw several pictures on one page (I think there was a wing, the character's eyes. etc.) I tried to click them. You don't need different ending but maybe different ways to examine or "watch" the humming-bird, leading to the same conclusion in the end, could be a way to expand the experience a bit. ;)

Submitted

I don't know the source material, but I enjoyed reading the twine. I think I agree with most comments. The meat of the game is the art and the meaning, and that's done well.

This is adorable! I love the artwork, games with hand-drawn art always seem rare. It's a cute little story, and the writing, while simple, did the job. I enjoyed it.

Developer

@antstiller: I wonder about putting multiple paths. HBH has always been linear to me. What kind of paths could the story have taken, do you think? Also, that painterly art was actually painted! I used watercolor, an acrylic color, pen & pencils, and some Crayola Twistables to make this art, and scanned it. Ton of fun, though the physical & digital touch-ups were difficult. I'm really happy you see this game as beautiful; that's truly wonderful to hear.

@stephen.gurnett: I'm glad to see you replayed it, and that you liked the rhythm. The re-reading mechanic is a very interesting idea (it kinda reminds me of the game Every Day The Same Dream). I'm sorry that I didn't think of it! I don't think I'll be changing HBH with that, but I'm going to keep that mechanic idea in mind for the future; it is a great idea! Also, glad you'll be checking out HCF; it just updated with voice-acting! I hope to see your thoughts soon.

Submitted

The painterly artwork is gorgeous and suits the prose very well. I agree that using the pages to break up the poem worked very well, too.

Also, an excellent choice with the poem itself.

I would have liked to have seen maybe one option to choose a different path (perhaps with just one different drawing).

A beautiful entry for the PD Jam.

Submitted

Interesting take on the poem, mixing the original imagery with a new interpretation. I ended up going through it a few times. The use of pages to break it up gives it an interesting rhythm versus just reading it on a page and the breaks themselves are well chosen.

Given that it's short enough I didn't mind re-reading, I wonder if it would be possible to make that a mechanic of the game and vary the text to create new meanings each time.

Good work, I've made a note to check out HCF.